The capacity to love ourselves

How we show up for ourselves and others matters. Feelings are fine, but behaviors say everything about who we are and what is important to us. Like a pebble thrown into a still pond creating a ripple effect, our actions have consequences which extend farther than we know. Each of us already has the capacity to be kind, compassionate, and loving beings, even if this capacity is constricted. Through consciously refining our character, it is possible to expand this capacity.

Our best selves

Every moment presents an opportunity for change. This is not to say we should be critical of ourselves. Rather, we must first learn to be kind, compassionate and forgiving of ourselves. When we come from our “fear place,” we restrict our very life force. Recognizing this, we can choose to depart from those behaviors which do not serve us well. Further, we become truly free when we mindfully choose to refine those behaviors which do serve us well.

Measures of character

The Jewish approach to character development is built upon strengthening specific middot – measures of character which impact how we treat ourselves, others and the world around us. The values addressed here include:

• Humility – Hebrew: Anavah
• Courage – Hebrew: Ometz lev (literally, “an effort of the heart”),
• Peace in the home – Hebrew: Shalom bayit
• Guarding one’s speech – Hebrew: Sh’mirat ha-lashon
• Gracious hospitality – Hebrew: Hachnasat orchim

Tikkun Midot in the military – Think about it:

In what ways does the Military shape one’s moral development and character?